It is Dark in Here....

This has been a long day. It started @3:30 a.m. I was up and on my way to the airport by 4:00. Got the call late yesterday that my dad was in the hospital. My sister sobbing on the phone, talking about a heart attack. Felt like I was in a fog, arranging jobs, packing clothes, giving Ned directions on feeding the cats.

Arrived in Chicago @ 8:00 a.m. and came directly to the hospital with my sisters. If you haven't experienced it, there is something startling, scary, and very, very serious when you see one of your parents in a hospital bed. Dad looked sort of sunken, and tired and old. I often have to remind myself that my parents are getting old(er!). I always feel so fortunate that they are both still here. But to see one of them like this breaks my heart. The doctors and the entire staff @ Lutheran General Hospital have been nothing short of professional, informative and caring. Conor joined us later on and we discussed things like the will, last wishes, etc. Topics that need to be discussed.

The memories of my life, the overwhelming sadness of the situation, combined with the need to stay present....very, very present in this moment now. This is what we have. Dad with his children, gathered around him today. Laughing at his corny jokes, telling stories, long pauses of silence in between.

Now, the hospital room is dark. Outside, cars go by in the night, headlights leaving trails of light in the long exposure photo I took from the window. The machines working to record dad's blood pressure and heart rate are purring next to his bed. Gretel and Conor have gone home for the night. Ann and I are here, illuminated by our laptops in the dark of the hospital room. It has been a long day. Right now, this very moment, is all we can count on for now. I love my family.

Expect good things....

Grateful....

Marcello, Best Cat in the World, November 2010

We head home tomorrow. Leaving Nonna and Jerry again. Days full of laughing, playing cards, working on crafts and delicious food. The good news is we will see them again in less than a month. So grateful to spend time with my family; I miss them.

I hope that everyone had a happy, safe Thanksgiving.  I am grateful that I did.

Expect good things....

On the Road Again...

Ned @ The Delaware Water Gap, November 2010

Nothing much that I like better than getting in the car for a road trip. My favorite trip is to Central PA. Ned and I left Jim's @ 5:15 a.m. on Tuesday. There is always a sense of adventure @ the beginning of a drive. The anticipation of getting to Nonna's is full of this excitement. We left as early as we did so that we could get through the city before the real traffic insanity started. Even with this, there are a couple of spots that are so congested, that I don't even like the radio on when I am trying to maneuver through them!

We stopped @ the Delaware Water Gap rest area. The day was foggy, grey and damp. When you stand on the strip of beach @ the water's edge, the cars are loudly hissing by on the highway behind you. They all have a destination in mind and are heading toward it @ great speed. On this strangely warm November day however, the sound of the traffic was somehow muted by the sight of this silent, steady stream of water. Wide, shallow and peaceful from where I stood, it crept along with a purpose known only to itself.  It was mesmerizing. I thought of the centuries of people who had come before me and who had stood where I was standing.  I wondered about what they had thought when looking at this gorgeous gift called river.

Expect good things....

@ 17....

How did it happen that Ned turned 17? Where did the years go? I know where the days went: diapers and nursing, reading aloud, learning to walk and talk, building extravagant Lego structures, train tracks that filled up the entire first floor of the house, Harry Potter, hours and hours of drumming practice, listening to and discussing all genres of music, working on farms and in gardens, practicing driving and discussing what the future holds. 

Those were the days, but the years...what happened to the years? 

My pride and greatest joy....happy birthday Ned.

Ned & Nonna, 1994

Ned, 1996

Ned, 2004

Ned, 2007

Ned, 2010

Expect good things.... 

Veteran's Day....

PeaceOnEarth

I think the thing that I most admire about Veteran's Day, is that it was originally called Armistice Day. From the Office of Public and Intergovernmental Affairs I found the following information on the history of Veteran's Day: ".... approved May 13, 1938, made the 11th of November in each year a legal holiday—a day to be dedicated to the cause of world peace and to be thereafter celebrated and known as "Armistice Day."" In 1954, the word "Armistice" was replaced with the word "Veterans". 


So, this is a day to commemorate, work toward, talk and think about and put into practice the idea of world peace. I am extremely grateful to all veteran's who have made enormous sacrifices for us. Today, I pay honor to all who have served in this capacity. But I also wanted to remember the original purpose of this day; it is important for me to remember.


And, please take a look @ the Arms for Peace website. Arms for Peace was conceived by my best teacher--my mother--as a memorial for families of soldiers killed in wars who lived in Central Pennsylvania. This memorial will list the soldier's name as well as the family members who have been left behind to rebuild their lives. The memorial is designed in the shape of arms in a warm embrace. 


My PeaceOnEarth image is available @ my Storefront as a small print or greeting card.


Expect good things....

A Season of Change...

The Bounty from the last Farmer's Market, October 2010

There is something about this transition from summer to autumn that really affects me. I envision the long months ahead, and the cold, dark days and feel a bit bereft. On Saturday, I went to the last Farmer's Market of the season in my neighborhood. Over the past few months, I have taken great delight in these markets. Whether right down the road from me, or in another town, these are not just places to buy locally grown food. These markets are community centers; a place to socialize with old friends or make new ones. I have had wonderful, fulfilling conversations about food, families and the world at large. I have shared recipes and laughed about life. In a world that is moving faster than I can often keep up with, this is a place to slow down and get my feet on the ground; it is like a walking meditation for me. I feel connected here, to the earth and to people.

Saturday was a beautiful day. Blue sky, wispy clouds and a crispness in the air. There was coffee and the most delicious cinnamon/sugar donuts available from the Springs General Store. A different energy was in the air. I sensed a hushed frenzy of buying. People were lamenting the fact that this was it, the end of the market season. I heard one woman tell her kids that "Mom is going on a cooking tear today", her arms laden with produce. I bought Granny Smith apples, new potatoes, radishes, green beans (which I am freezing), a rag tag collection of tomatoes, zucchini, tiny eggplants, gorgeous carrots, spicy arugula, the cutest little cauliflowers (which the farmer dubbed "Pocket Cauliflowers") that I have ever seen and a jar of the crispest, sweetest homemade Bread and Butter Pickles I have had in a long time. A lot of food for us. I realize of course, that I was trying to stay connected by buying so much; trying to stay connected to the earth, to these people, to this day.

The trick will be actually eating it all. I made a soup in the crock pot yesterday with the following ingredients: lentils, onions, garlic, zucchini, eggplant, cauliflower, broccoli and tomatoes with cumin, salt and pepper. It was a perfect supper with Spanish Rice and homemade bread. It was fulfilling at the end of a long day; real soul food for me.

Slowly but surely, we are moving toward the holidays. It is apparent in the cooler air, I see it on the calendar, and Kmart has Christmas stuff an aisle over from the Halloween costumes. If you are looking for the perfect small gift for a friend, a teacher, your sister or anyone else on your list, please visit my Storefront. I have a number of images available as greeting cards or small prints. I will say Thank You for supporting one of your local artists!

Expect good things....

A Mighty Maple Takes a Fall....

Jim in Bridgehampton, NY   October, 2010

Take a look @ this tree. It came down on the front yard of a property in Bridgehampton.

The tree stood like a sentinel for more decades than anyone can remember.  With an enormous canopy that dominated nearly every other tree on the street, it was one of only two Silver Maple trees that are known to be in Bridgehampton. This tree was on the spit of land between the sidewalk and the street in Mrs. Di Petris' front yard. She is very familiar with this tree, having spent many decades on the same property together. She happened to be home on Thursday and was in her sun room in the front of the house, when she heard a strange crackling sound.

Upon peering out the window, she actually saw this mighty tree uproot itself and fall slowly to the ground. There wasn't a storm and no high winds going on @ the time. The tree just fell over. It pulled down wires and crushed everything in its path on the way down, which was mostly just other small trees. The gigantic canopy filled the entire roadway. It is nothing short of a miracle that no one was walking or driving by @ the precise moment that this majestic tree decided to give up. It is any body's guess as to how old the tree is.

I hope before they cut it up and cart it away, that someone will determine the age of it. It gave me great pause to stop for a moment, and think about all that had happened in the world since this tree first took root. It has to be well over a hundred years old. It must have survived the 1938 hurricane, not to mention countless snow and ice storms, disease, etc. What a mighty strength it had to have survived all of these years.

Here is Jim, who stands @ 6'1", in the crook of the tree.

Expect good things.... 

Heartbreaking....

Sagg Pond Corn, November 2008

It was with overwhelming sadness that I read about the suicide of Tyler Clementi. The bleakness of this story leaves me nearly, heartbreakingly speechless. I feel frightened when I think that this young college student was literally bullied to death for being himself. I feel frightened because it could happen to anyone we know. We are very fragile beings and don't know how much anyone but ourselves can tolerate.

When I hear about any type of bullying, I become enraged. I have experienced my share of bullying in this life. It is terrifying to be bullied, or to have someone you love be bullied. It can be a situation that leaves you feeling panicked, full of anxiety, extremely unnerved and with whatever you have left in you, you will certainly also feel enraged. However, sometimes the fear is so great that you can't do anything to protect or defend yourself. Bullies are smart, manipulative, mean, sneaky people. So sometimes, even when you ask for help, you often don't get it.

All I can think to say is that we must all of us work extremely hard not to let this type of behavior go on. If you are a parent talk to your children about bullying; go to your school and demand to know what they are doing to teach tolerance. If you are a teacher, go to your school and demand to know what they are going to do to continue to teach tolerance. If you are a citizen of a community that you care about, find out what you can do to help teach tolerance. One of the best organizations that I know of for teaching tolerance is the Southern Poverty Law Center. They have a program for schools; you can get a copy of their latest Teaching Tolerance film for free. Did you hear me say for free?

In light of this posting, I find it difficult to sign off in my usual manner.
But with great honor and love for Mr. Clementi, his family, and all others who have suffered from bullying, I will leave you with a sense of hope for a more tolerable, loving world, and will still sign off with:

Expect good things....

Just Plain Delicious....

The Best Tasting Salad There Is!  Sept. 2010

This salad is one of the simplest dishes to make and it never fails to satisfy me. I do believe I posted about this salad a few weeks ago, during the peak tomato/cucumber season, but I must write about it again. Tonight, while I was making dinner, I noticed a handful of Sun Gold tomatoes still in a bowl on the counter. Right next to it was a plump Kirby cucumber. So I chopped them up with a scallion and got some of my basil from the deck. The dressing is safflower oil, white balsamic vinegar, salt & pepper. Every time I make this salad, I think it will be good. Then, I take a taste after tossing it together and it just blows my mind! Something about the pungent, almost licorice-y basil with the crisp cucumber and the very sweet, juicy tomatoes makes for the perfect salad. I do not think that this photo will really express how good it is, and I know my writing won't express it. So, I recommend just making a batch for yourself and your family. Hurry up before the cucumbers and tomatoes are gone for good. We never have any of this left at the end of the meal. Tonight, we will have it with a quiche I made with sauteed sun dried tomatoes, scallions, garlic, basil and goat cheese. 
Dinner in 10 minutes!


Expect good things....

A Sad Adieu....

My Last Tomatoes, Sept. 2010

Here they are:  3 of the last tomatoes from my deck garden for the 2010 growing season. In my travels over  the past few days, I have been stopping in @ any farmer's market and farm stand that I can find. Chatting with farmers and gardeners and talking to them about what is happening. And what is happening is that it is now Fall. Summer is officially over and we are moving into the colder, darker part of the year. I am very happy to say that I made a real effort over these past few months to shop and buy local. The fresh produce portion of my grocery bill for the past 5 months was all spent @ local farm stands and farmer's markets.  I tried to get to the East Hampton market on Friday mornings when I could. That market was the biggest here and had the most variety of products. In addition to vegetables and flowers, there was fish, homemade bread and pasta, honey and other bee products and the Pickle Man. I first heard about him from people who were basically freaking out and talking about his pickles as though he were a drug dealer!  His New Pickles are something you could easily get addicted to and you probably won't get in trouble with the law for eating too many of them. 

Coincidentally, I am also just about to finish a wonderful book, Animal, Vegetable, Miracle by Barbara Kingsolver. This is the tale of Ms. Kingsolver's family as they made their way through an entire year of eating locally (most of their food was grown or raised by themselves). It is brimming with information about how they did it, and about how you can do it. I am not far enough along yet to be canning and putting things up in the freezer. However, I was inspired enough to spend a good portion of  my grocery money on locally grown food. I was also inspired enough that I am considering growing more food on my deck next season (lettuces, herbs, scallions, etc.). 

So, as we move into Fall, I feel enlightened, for the first time really, about everything shifts from season to season.  I have a heightened awareness and respect for all things around me in the natural world. The farmer's markets don't just support local growers, they also serve as links to our neighbors. If I buy my lettuce @ the A&P, I might have a conversation with the checkout girl about her day, but chances are she doesn't know much about the origin of the food she just rang up for me. However, if I buy my lettuce @ the farm stand, I can have a conversation with the person who grew it, who is a neighbor of mine--a member of my community. So in addition to just purchasing food from local people, I have had an opportunity to make new acquaintances. I have been educated and inspired by them. I will say a fond farewell to the greens and tomatoes as the root vegetables move into the farmer's markets. And, as my food consciousness continues to evolve, I eagerly await next year's planting season with great visions of how to improve on this newfound knowledge I am so grateful to have acquired.

Expect good things....

September Saturday @ the Ashawagh Hall Farmer's Market....

Balsam Farms Green Beans, Sept. 2010

Balsam Farms Canned Goods, Sept. 2010

Balsam Farms Heirloom Tomatoes, Sept. 2010

Paul Hamilton's Basil and Parsley, Sept. 2010

Some Memorable Fall Days....

My Dad and Me    Montauk, NY    Sept. 2010

Saturday was a fantastic day. The sky was a perfect blue, the wispy clouds were out of a storybook, and there was a crispness in the air that put a little pep in your step. I had the great pleasure of teaching a Landscape Photography class @ Quail Hill Farm sponsored by Peconic Land Trust. I had four wonderful students in my class; they were all girls, ranging from about 9 to 15. They were smart, interested and eager to learn. A perfect size group with the curiosity level that makes teaching the exciting and satisfying job it was meant to be.

We wandered through the fields and orchard, walked up the renowned sledding hill (of course, there was no snow yesterday, just an awesome view across the farm. We could see almost to the ocean) and ended up @ the chicken coop. The girls (the chickens, that is, not the students) were clucking around, digging holes in the ground so they could take naps in the cool dirt. As we wound up the class, we came upon a film crew wrapping up a shoot with Alec Baldwin. He very graciously chatted with the girls and posed for a photo with them (you can see that photo here). What a great surprise! I will say that Mr. Baldwin was polite, gracious and very friendly. Thank you Mr. Baldwin; you sure made the day for all of us!

Dad called after that. He was already in East Hampton and hungry. Ned and I went down the road to Balsam Farm to buy produce and then met Dad for lunch. There he was, 75 years old, getting out of his car, all the way from Illinois. The man loves to drive. He likes to be in the car, listening to music and visiting with people along the way. It is so awesome that he is still doing that. I will say something that I said a while ago: I miss my family. I am one of those people who have family scattered across the country. I wish it weren't that way.

On Sunday, Ned, Dad and I went to Montauk for the day. It was beautiful. We went to a gallery, stopped in @ Theodore Roosevelt County Park and walked up the hill to the lone tree (Ned took the above photo of us). We went to Ditch Plains, got enormous milk shakes @ John's Drive-In and headed back home. And today, I spent the entire day with Dad. He drove and I did loads of errands: the cable store for a new modem, the vet for cat food, the post office, LVIS to look @ the used books. Lots of mundane stops that were more fun to do with him. And we chatted and listened to music the entire time. Tonight, on the way home, we drove down to Louse Point. The sun was setting and the moon was up. The sky was incredible; all pink and orange and salmon colored. Jet trails lit up by the sun, a very bright star in the west. Simon and Garfunkel playing on the cd, all three of us knew the words to the songs. I just got all welled up. I wanted to cry and I am not really sure why. Except that I was with my dad, who I don't often see. We have had 3 nice days together. We have really come to love each other and to talk about our lives in an intimate, respectful, loving way. I am so grateful to have this relationship with him. I am so grateful that both of my parents are still here. Sometimes, the best things in life fill me up so much that the only thing to do is cry and say "thank you".

Expect good things....

My Ideas vs. Reality

Ned @ Dairy Queen, Central PA, August 2010

I have been thinking about my perception of things. In particular, I am thinking of music and how I relate to it. The main benefit of music for me is the effect on my mood. It can energize me, comfort me and inspire me. When I think about music, I think about how it makes me feel. I have never taken the time to think about how the musicians felt. I figured they were happy, doing what they loved, making a living, feeling adored by the world. I have read biographies on musicians, and of course there is a lot of hard work, disappointment, hassle and even tragedy that can go along with the job.

On this note, I will reveal that I am a fanatical Led Zeppelin fan. Never have I experienced so many different emotions listening to music than I have with them. The level of musicianship that Robert Plant, Jimmy Page, John Bonham and John Paul Jones had together has never ceased to surprise and amaze me. They were constantly pushing the envelope and testing the boundaries. The compelling rhythm and bass, the commanding guitar and that voice on top of it all. The music has enormous energy, drive and most of all, passion. The passion of youth and life and love.

Recently, I had dinner @ a friend's house who has a collection of photographs by Jim Marshall. He is the man behind the lens of countless rock & roll photos that I have seen all of my life. A talented photographer with a decades long career, trusted by many artists to capture them at their most outrageous as well as their most vulnerable moments.  A particular portrait on the wall is a stunning moment of Robert Plant and Jimmy Page in the back seat of a limousine. One of them is looking out the window, the other looking down @ the floor. I think Robert Plant has his arms crossed across his chest. There is a look of exhaustion, discontent and maybe even anger on their faces. This was a genuine moment in an average work day, for these two young musicians.

Two things have happened to me since I saw this photograph. The first is this: everyone who is working, no matter the industry or business they are in, is working. Along with work comes the natural course of life and it is not wonderful all the time. It can be exhilarating, challenging, and even seem hardly worth it some of the time. The second thought is this: I can easily get an idea in my head about what something is. However, that isn't necessarily what it is. For instance, I assume that life is wonderful all the time for someone who appears "successful". This of course, is not true. I knew it wasn't true before I saw the portrait. But somehow, when I looked @ this picture of two of my favorite artists (who I have enormous respect for) in a cheerless moment, a higher consciousness came over me. I had a new kind of respect and awareness. And this awareness covered everything; not just my impassioned fan feelings for Led Zeppelin. We are all the same when it comes right down to it. Our blood is all red, we all came from a mother and father, we all have feelings and emotions, including elation and despair, sadness and joy. We really are all the same in some ways. What a wonderful thing to consciously become aware of and to allow myself to think about. I am glad I am open these life experiences.

Expect good things...

Appreciation for Familiarity

The familiar face of Marcello, 16 year old Best Cat in the World

Have you ever taken a look @ something--a room you live in, the face of someone you love, your favorite pet or flower, an old book that has been held by many hands over time--and had a surge of compassion in your heart? Have you had that experience of actually feeling like your heart skips a beat and takes your breath away for an instant? It is Sunday morning, I worked for 12 hours straight yesterday. It was a beautiful day, happy bride and groom, loads of loving friends and family. That kind of work is interesting....the days are long and the agenda for the day is very full, and I almost forget about everything else in my life. In this situation, the only thing to do is move forward, work hard, and hope for the best. It was good to get home after midnight and cozy up in bed with someone I love. This morning when I woke up, the temperature had dropped, the sky was overcast, and Fall was in the air. Jim had made my coffee and I was preparing it in my favorite cup. I looked over at the row of jars on his counter: coffee, tea, cookies, nuts and granola. The warm light from the stove fell across the cherry counter tops, and my heart gave one of those little flutters. I felt comforted by being in a space that is full of familiar love and dependability. It seems lately I keep thinking and writing about the simple pleasures of life, but it is these small things that keep me going in a very complex, extremely challenging world. This week I have exercise class and I have a meeting with my artist's group; this means I am going to be out around dinner time for 2 nights. Now I don't like this, because I like to be home with my family at the end of the day. This feeling doesn't stop me from going out, but I am very aware of how important the time together is. I will try to prepare some food ahead of time that can be eaten while I am gone....that will make me feel better (and will also make my hungry family happy!) My gratitude for the familiar things in my life is alive this morning...

Expect good things...

Nostalgia in the Air.....

Ned, thinking outside of the box @ a young age.

There is something very nostalgic about the changing of summer into fall. The crisp, cooler air blows with a bit more energy than the hot wind of August. I get a nostalgic feeling this time of year that seems to revolve around going back to school. And so, this morning, I drove Ned to his new school. We are very hopeful that it will be a satisfying experience. The education system in our country is not very encouraging right now, and our local community is no exception. There are a lot of issues and problems with many aspects of it. All the testing, the big classrooms, and the inability on the teacher's part to veer off course into something that might be interesting because they have to stay on course for the testing...and so it goes, around and around.  If you are a student who thinks outside of the box and is interested in things other than the scientific tables or all of the wars our country has been in, then you are in for it.  You are basically in trouble if these things don't interest you. I was always (and still am) a hands-on learner. I don't just want the recipe for making bread--I want to make the bread--get my hands in the flour, watch it rise, bake it and then have the experience of eating it warm with butter melted on top. You can take something like making bread and teach the following: math (the measuring/cooking temps, etc.), history (the history of growing/selling wheat in various countries and times), science (why does the yeast make it rise?), english (write the recipe out so that it makes culinary sense, and write about your experience of making the bread), and you could also do all of this in Spanish, French or Chinese (if you need to take a language requirement!).I hope that as time goes on, educators with an interest in teaching about things that are more relevant to living will be able to move into the mainstream.  I am not implying that teaching bread making alone makes for a well rounded society. But interesting, exciting, innovative public education is crucial to our whole society. We have to keep kids interested in staying in school. This video clip of Sir Ken Robinson giving a talk on creativity and how current education standards and schools squash creativity in kids is one that I love. When I hear people like this talk, I am encouraged and know that I am not alone. He says that "Creativity is as important in education as literacy...." I could not agree more.

My favorite teacher of all time was Michael Kaplan @ Nichols Middle School in Evanston, IL. He was our science teacher. He had a long ponytail and wore hip-hugger pants. Before each class started, we could ask him 3 questions...about anything! If he didn't know the answer, he would get back to us tomorrow on it. As a way to teach us about science, he taught us photography. We made pinhole cameras and developed our pictures right in the classroom. He was dedicated and open minded and smart. For a long time, I was conscious of the fact that this is where I got my initial interest in photography nurtured. But it was only a couple of years ago that I finally realized that what I was really reacting to emotionally was how Mr. Kaplan was teaching us, not just what he was teaching us. He was interested in us and what we thought. He was listening and honoring our thoughts and ideas. I am 50 years old and writing about my middle school science teacher; I am very grateful to have had at least one teacher that I remember with great fondness like this.


Expect good things....

Five Days in September, 9/5/10

Nonna's Apples

I will write this now as tomorrow I will be in the car for most of the day. We head home very early in the morning. I hate to leave here. I don't like to leave Nonna; it is so nice to be here with her. The house is gorgeous and relaxing. The cats are so sweet. Nonna and Ned have been playing cards all afternoon. At one point, we went out to the back room and I stretched out on the hammock wrapped up in a quilt. It was quite chilly with loads of clouds in the sky; we could see a beautiful blue between the various layers as they moved slowly west. There was a mother robin with a baby bird....a baby bird in August! What is that all about? That goes in the Alfie file for sure....

We went over to the side yard and picked apples to take home. One of the big old trees in the yard is almost completely hollow and producing some of the crispest, sweetest apples I have ever had. We decided that one good blow and that tree might just topple over. Good thing no one is ever hanging around in that yard. 

I collected a bunch of seeds that might work as anti-deer plants: Mullein, Lamb's Ears, Mallow and Echinacea. I don't think the Echinacea is anti-deer, but I can put it on the deck next summer....and all of the seeds came from Nonna's yard.

We just showed Nonna the Chris Bliss video. The one where he juggles to The Beatles Golden Slumbers....she loved it. If you haven't seen it, be sure to check it out. If you have seen it, watch it again...you can't help but feel good after watching that.

 It has been wonderful to be here and now it is time to go home to work and school and our real life....

Expect good things....

Five Days in September, 9/4/10

Apple Crumble @ Nonna's

 

 

Overnight, the temperature dropped 30 degrees. It has been so hot the past couple of days, that it was hard to find any relief. This morning, when I got up for my walk, I dug around in my suitcase for layers to put on because I don't have any warm clothes with me. The sky was overcast and dramatic all day long and it was very windy. We went to a couple of farm stands to see what was available, and someone started talking about making soup. This conversation inspired me to make a pot of vegetable soup for our supper.  When we returned home from shopping, Ned went out to the side yard and picked apples off of the tree.  We had this apple/peach crumble for dessert; this is one of the simplest things to prepare.  I picked up a jar of homemade apple butter @ one of the farms we stopped in. I mixed some of the apple butter with Nonna's apples, local peaches, a bit of sugar and cinnamon and a touch of apple cider. For the top I mixed up oats, butter, sugar and cinnamon and sprinkled it on top. I buttered the dish and put it all in the oven on a medium temperature and kept an eye on it. We had it for dessert with coffee ice cream...can't say much more than WOW! It was simple and delicious.....nothing quite as satisfying to me as preparing food (especially home/locally grown) for my family to eat.

I would also like to comment on Hurricane Earl. I was concerned about leaving the East End of Long Island to come out to Nonna's while this Category 4 storm appeared to be heading to my  neighborhood. In preparation for it, I put my potted herbs inside so that they would not be damaged or destroyed. After I got here, as they reported on the storm's potential severity, I asked the cat sitter to drop the deck chairs over the side into the yard. I didn't want them to blow into the sliding glass doors. Of course, the timing couldn't be worse for people in communities like ours as this was expected to come ashore on Labor Day weekend....the last big money making weekend for many businesses in our seasonal economy. As the storm lost steam and we were spared what could have been serious damage, comments began to pop up on Facebook regarding Earl. These comments were negative and sarcastic about the "over the top, hyped up" reporting regarding the severity of this storm. Some comments insinuated that the Weather Channel just wants to make money reporting on these storms; the worse the news, the more the viewers will watch and therefore, will stay away from affected areas. Of course, I hope this isn't true. My point here is that I didn't see one comment about how grateful anyone was that it wasn't a Category 4 storm by the time it hit us. We don't have to go very far back in our memories to be reminded of how catastrophic a storm could be---it has only been 5 years since Katrina. Much of New Orleans is still a mess and many people's lives were destroyed and changed forever by that storm. And, if you want to read about a storm where the weather people did get the information wrong, pick up a copy of Isaac's Storm.  This is a riveting tale about one of the worst storms in the history of the U.S. Of course it is a terrible blow (no pun inteneded) economically for everyone on Labor Day weekend to lose business due to weather. But if there is a serious storm heading our way, I would rather have too much information than not enough. And I for one am grateful that Hurricane Earl wasn't a Category 4 by the time he paid us a visit.

Expect good things...

Five Days in September, 9/3/10

Yoder's Pickles, Belleville, PA

Today is a beautiful morning. The sun is out and it is going to be hot again. Right now though, it is  in the '70's. The weather feels very pleasant in a skirt and sandals. We are 3 generations of pacifists in the car, propelling down the mountain, listening to John Lennon loud. What a beautiful experience....this feels like a perfect day.

We have to drive over a couple of mountains to get to Belleville, where we will go to Peight's Dry Goods store. This is an Amish market where you can get just about anything you might need for your Amish home (pots and pans, herbs, flour, canned goods made by local people, fabrics, socks and straw hats). We are heading over to shop and have a picnic. The store sits @ the bottom of a mountain with acres and acres of corn, wheat, and beans growing all around. Farmhouses are visible in all directions and clotheslines are stretched across enormous yards, with clothing belonging to all ages of people, dancing in the wind.

Before we get to Peight's, we stop @ a roadside stand in front of a simple, sturdy farmhouse. Three children in ages ranging from 6 to 11 run out from the house to greet us. The 9 year old girl asks if I would like to buy some Tupperware. I thank her and tell her "not today", and peruse their jars of dill pickles, sweet pickles, beets and spaghetti sauce. There are also fresh tomatoes, gourds and squash. One time a couple of years ago when we stopped here, there were perfect loaves of delicious hot bread for sale. We bought one, and had it for our picnic that day, and all I can say is wow! For our picnic today, I buy the sweet pickles and we head down to the store. We buy cheese and hard salami, potato salad, bread and cold drinks. Outside, we put our blanket down and stretch out along a split rail fence. The sky is a beautiful blue with wispy, dreamy clouds. There are hawks flying overhead and loads of small white and yellow butterflies flying all across the top of the beans in the field next to us.  Two young women are heading across the field toward the store. In their traditional clothing, with the light the way it is, they look like they are walking right out of a painting.

We eat our simple lunch, which tastes like a feast.  As we satisfy our hunger and nourish our souls, I am conscious of the fact that I will remember this sublime day for a long, long time.

Expect good things....  

Five Days in September, 9/2/10

Breakfast @ Nonna's, Penn. Furnace, PA

I was up from 3:30 a.m. until around 10:00 p.m. yesterday. It was really hot, and only cooled down a bit by nightfall. When my head hit the pillow, I almost immediately fell asleep. I tried to read the Centre Daily Times, but did not get far....woke up @ 6:30 a.m. and went out for a walk.

I love the early morning; I think it is the best time of day. It is fairly hushed here, except for enormous trucks rushing down Route 45 with loads of who-knows-what inside. There are crows, cicadas and crickets out. The fog is lying just above the top of the corn, and the sun is creeping over the tops of the mountains. Everything is damp and cut grass is sticking to my shoes. As I come around the back of Nonna's house and look down the long valley which is her back yard, there are two hot air balloons in the distance on an early morning flight. They move in a dreamy, floaty way....like nothing could touch them or disturb them. The horses in the field stare @ me but won't come over to the fence.  The phlox, chicory, and mullein line the edges of the road....standing in their late summer finery, waiting for what comes next.

I get back home and make the coffee. As the sticky buns warm up in the oven, their cinnamon aroma fills the kitchen. I make a fruit salad with some local peaches, and other fruit and yogurt. In the cupboard, I find the perfect bowl to eat my fruit salad in. It is thick and heavy and white and has been around for a long time. This bowl was made by Jackson China and likely had a life in a restaurant or on a train car diner long before it landed in Nonna's kitchen. It is white with a green stripe around the top and an insignia with what looks like a dove and two horses and the words "Virtue, Liberty and Independence." The fruit salad, with Jerry's homemade granola on top tastes better in this bowl. I am very aware of how much pleasure I get from a little thing like eating my breakfast in a dish that I really love. I highly recommend paying attention to small details like this.....it makes life very pleasurable.

Expect good things.....

Five Days in September, 9/1/10

Dairy Cow @ Grange Fair, Centre Hall, PA

Today, up @ 3:30 a.m., packed the car, got the house together, all burners off on the stove, water and food down for the cats….into the car and off to Nonna’s. Grateful for the easy weather, the early rise (we beat the traffic going thru NYC), a chatty 16 year old in the car with me, music, music, music (radio is awesome—metal, country, evangelical, soul---the whole gamut of American life coming magically out of the speakers in the car), unbelieveably beautiful scenery and especially grateful for my good brakes @ a particular point on I-80 in eastern PA…..and that is all I will say about that!
Stopped @ the Delaware Water Gap. Incredible to get out of the car, walk across the parking lot, go down a very steep stairway and land on a little beach with dirty looking sand, and then, across the flowing river, a majestic mountain that is nearly within reach…leaves me nearly speechless….I can’t really figure out what to say about it….it has just risen out of the earth and is part of the earth and is independent in it’s own right…breath-taking.

Ned on the beach, walking in the water, picking up stones and then, comes back with an armload full of trash. I give him our grocery bag and he fills it to the brim with trash…and the beach is left clean. An amazingly conscious boy…..

We finally arrived in Centre Hall, PA and met Nonna @ the Grange Fair. This is one of the best fairs in the United States of America. I believe it is the last encampment fair in the country; people move into the fairgrounds into tents for the week. There is literally a city of tents within the fairgrounds. This year, there are over 900 tents set up. Each tent can have 1, 2, or 3 generations of family visiting at a time. And people move in for the week with all the amenities of home: couches, beds, carpeting, tv sets, etc. It is really something worth seeing. And of course, like any good country fair, there is the midway with thrilling rides and crazy games, great carnival food, beautiful canned goods and enormous sunflowers with seed heads bigger than dinner plates on display in the Grange building. Ned even got a haircut @ the fair. My favorite part is the 4H kids and their animals….I especially love the dairy cows. They are so sweet and mellow and just stand around looking beautiful and sort of dreamy….it is full of light in the dairy cow barn. Do yourself a favor and try to go to the Grange Fair at least once in your life….I don’t think you will regret it.

Expect good things…..

Taking the Time to Walk in the Corn....

Corn on Long Lane, August 2010

Have you ever taken the time to walk in the corn? If not, I highly recommend it. Get out of your car and head right in between two rows.....stop and listen. It will probably be hushed, you may hear a car once in while, but mostly you will hear the rustling of the stalks, a crow in the sky above, maybe the footsteps of another creature somewhere up ahead. Closely look @ the colors of the stalks....green, yellow, red....and look on the ground. There will be evidence there of critters who came before you....deer hooves and droppings (watch your step....wear you mucking boots for this!), feathers, eaten ears of corn, a variety of interesting bugs. And then, look up @ the sky through the stalks. The blue and the clouds are there looking down @ you in the field....imagine yourself in the middle of the field....let your imagination go. Give yourself the gift of taking the time to do this. It is something I have often thought of doing, but hadn't done until this week. When I did it, it was comforting and quiet, interesting and intriguing--real fulfillment for my soul....the world is a wonderful place.

Expect good things....

Tulips, 2009

So due to some strange feelings I was having around my heart, my doctor sent me to a cardiologist. I am convinced that the feelings are hormonal in nature, but they decided to run the gamut of tests anyway. I was happy to oblige as a way to eliminate any guessing as to what the problem might be. I got flying colors on the EKG and stress test, and today had an echocardiogram. I was on my left side, facing away from the machine for most of the test. And then, the chatty, friendly technician asked me to turn and lay on my back. I could sort of see the screen from where I was, but I turned my head for a better look, and the tech turned the monitor toward me and turned the volume on the machine up....and I had one of those amazing moments of complete awe....it took my breath away. I thought: I am looking inside myself. That heart is mine, it is keeping me alive, it is making me breathe, and think, and see and do all the things that I am doing all the time. Wow....to see it and hear it, and to acknowledge it drove me to think about giving it the highest respect that I can....it is why I am here.

Expect good things.....

Rainy Sunday Morning

Tomato Cucumber Basil Salad, 8/22/10

I got up this morning with the specific intent of going on a bike ride. The rain was coming down, however, so I moved on to Plan B. I baked a batch of corn muffins and made this Cucumber/Tomato/Basil salad. Cucumbers and tomatoes are from the gardens of friends, basil is off of my deck, and scallions, I will admit, are from the supermarket. I dressed it with white balsamic vinegar and olive oil. I am having some now with a few oil cured olives thrown in....what a delicious, rainy, Sunday!

The piano teacher next door is playing something lovely, and life feels good today.

Expect good things.....

Here they are....

My Tomatoes, August 18, 2010

My Tomatoes....what I mean by this is that I grew them....actually, I didn't grow them, they grew themselves. I think I bought the plants at The Seedlings Project greenhouse sale in the Spring. These plants plugged away through the incredible heat and drought we had....I had to water almost everyday this Summer....and just this morning when I went out, all of these were ripe and ready to go....now we will have to eat a lot of Tomato Sandwiches!  These little pieces of fruit feel really nice in your hand when you pick them, and you can taste the long days of Summer in them when you take a bite.

Expect good things.....

Something in the Air....

Sunflower, 8/15/10

....the light has a different slant, the breeze feels different--not quite as humid and sticky....Summer is slowing down and not as fierce in temperament as it was even last week. There is a definite shift going on.

I love this sunflower. It brought great joy to me as I admired it's progress over the past few weeks. It has been eaten by someone so it was a food source. It also looks like bees could have been in it (see the pollen on the bottom petals). So this single flower served many purposes for the short time it graced my deck. I am going to dry it out and save the seeds (the ones that are left after the birds get at them!) and plant them next summer.

I met a wonderful woman today, Georgia Van Ryzin, at an art fair in Montauk. She is making darling bags and skirts from vintage fabrics. You should try to find her at a fair next summer. I bought a sweet little shoulder bag that looks like Marimekko, but I don't think it is. I just love people who make things by hand, especially when it is out of recycled/reused materials....hers was one of the few booths that did not have inexpensive, mass produced merchandise (junk!) that was imported from China or India....she had the best booth @ the fair....I wish her great success and would love to buy one of her skirts next summer!

Tomatoes, tomatoes, tomatoes!

Amber Waves Farm, 8/14/10

I don't know what it is about tomatoes, but I love them!

There may not be anything better than eating a cherry tomato, warm,
right off the plant. Let yourself go, experiment & try a different variety of tomato @ the farmer's market each week! Talk to the farmer selling them, find out what they like about the different varieties.
The small ones are wonderful (you can eat them like peanuts!), the big ones are great for slicing and eating on sandwiches or with mozzarella and basil, the green ones, the orange ones, the yellow ones....the list is endless, sumptuous, delectable!! And, they are so photogenic. I must have hundreds of tomato pictures...they just always look perfect!

If you are a gardener, you should definitely check out Seed Savers. This organization is passing on seeds from one generation to the next, and you can get some of them for your own garden. There is something really wonderful about eating a tomato that you might actually know the history of....where it came from, who grew it, how far back the seed lineage goes....and even if you don't know that, it is a great place to start and let your imagination run wild!

I took this photo @ Amber Waves Farm this morning....an awesome place that everyoneon the East End should visit!

Tomato & Basil Morning....

It is perfect now, this time of year. I am eating food I have grown and
bread I have baked....they taste better because I know where they came from.
I feel good feeding this fare to my family...it fills their stomachs,
nourishes their souls and puts my spirit at ease.

Animals.....

This is Miss Mookie Rodriguez.
She is the 2nd best cat in the world....17 years old and 6 lbs.!

More Families.....

Dad and Gretchen, Arlington Heights, IL   July, 2010

I miss my family. My dad is 75 years old and I don't see him very often.
I miss my family.

Families....

Families...I don't know about you, but my family is spread out around
the country. I have just spent the weekend in Chicago with my sister.
We don't see each other much, which is a shame. It seems difficult and
expensive to arrange visits with each other. I loved
being in the city this weekend. It is SO nice to be able to walk to things. We went to the bookstore last night @ 8:00. It was great to look around in for a while, get an iced tea and then walk home....

Midwestern Weather

I had forgotten how amazing the force of a good thunderstorm is. We
have been in the middle of an insane thunderstorm here in Chicago for
the last 7 hours. The thunder and lightening woke me up at least three
times. There was one crack of lightening that woke me out of a sound
sleep. The thunder sounded like it rolled on and on all the way to Indiana.
The power of nature takes my breath away.

We have to let them fly....

We are standing together in the terminal @ JFK. We are finally here...you announced the invitation for this trip last January. It sounded like a wonderful idea and experience for you. With your full time job you paid for your own ticket....and now here we are. You, a good few inches taller than me....excited, and eager for the adventure that awaits you. Me, feeling small and short next to you....smiling with tears in my eyes....I know I have to let you go and, more importantly, it is time for you to go. I can see the wanderlust that you have is the same as mine. They call for passengers to board. You give me a big hug and tell me you love me. I tell you the same and also say what I always do: "Use your best judgement". And off you go, on the line, handing your ticket to the attendant, you turn and wave and walk up the ramp with a smile. Now, I am alone in JFK; enormous tears filling my eyes. I look next to me and there is a woman shorter than me with a teenage daughter. We look @ each other and smile and look away. A few seconds later I look @ her again. I said: "I know we have to do this, but it sure isn't easy when it is the first time." She comes over and hugs me! She said: "He will be alright. He probably won't think of you all week!" I reply with: "I hope he doesn't! I know he will be o.k., it just isn't an easy thing to do." And then I say: "Are you sending your girl off too?" "No," she replies, "we are heading home. We just got the call that my husband is leaving for Iraq, so we are going home to send him off....". "Safe travels" I reply, "and thank you." And so, I leave Gate 15 in Terminal 3 and walk back to the train. From the window of the train platform, I can see your plane. I stand there and watch the pilot check the flaps on the tail. I see the ladder move away from the back end. Slowly, your plane backs up and moves down the tarmac. I lose sight of you, but then I see a plane that is probably yours as it takes off into the sky, taking you on to the next step of your adventure. Have fun Ned, I already miss you.

I went to the beach today with friends. It was a gorgeous day; the ocean was rowdy and full of big swells. If you went in, you would get pulled down the beach quite a way by the surf....too cold for me, but it was gorgeous. I saw people having lunch from the food shack @ the beach. The food looked good, but what I really noticed was all the containers.....the styrofoam cups (who would still use styrofoam? I have to research to find out if there is some kind of safe styrofoam), the plastic containters for the sandwiches (why can't they just wrap the sandwiches in butcher paper?), the straws and lids.....in Naples, FL @ Lowdermilk Park, they don't have straws and lids and they have paper cups. Imagine how much less garbage there would be without the straws and lids. I made a sandwich @ home and will recycle the paper I wrapped it in. I had my cold drinks in reusable bottles or cans that will be recycled. I have been buying Sun Chips as well. The bags are compostable and I have a compost pile....one of my greatest thrills is seeing the worms working away in my compost pile. I buy food often when I am out....but I am very conscious of the trash @ the end. This idea of "one use" products has got to be something that we all become mindful of....the planet can not sustain it for long.

Sun Chips Link

When I was pregnant, my midwife detected an irregular heart rate in my baby. This happened about 5 weeks or so before Ned was born. My midwife suggested that I go to Winthrop University Hospital. It was small and personal and they had a neo-natal unit. In one visit for a regular prenatal check-up, I went from having a midwife and planning a birth in a birthing center, to needing a hospital with a neo-natal unit with doctors I did not know. As it turned out, we were guided to amazing doctors to help us through this scary time. The pediatric cardiologist we were referred to was Dr. Milton Reitman. Over the next month before Ned was born, I never met Dr. Reitman; I only met the other doctors in his practice during my visits to their office. Ned was born on a Sunday morning and over the course of the next few days, I saw Dr. Reitman's partners in the neo-natal unit. During the week, the nurses and doctors taught me how to listen to Ned's heart and give him his medication. He was bigger than most of the babies in the unit and was actually healthy except for this irregular heart rate that only happened sporadically. On Friday, I wasn't sure why we were still in the hospital, so I called Dr. Reitman and asked him why we were still there. He asked me to meet him in the neo-natal unit that afternoon. Having never met in person before, I introduced myself and Dr. Reitman's reply was:

"So you are Mrs. Big Mouth?!"......I was taken aback and said: "Excuse me?" He then proceeded to tell me that he wishes more parents would call him and ask more questions like I had when I didn't know why Ned was still in the hospital. Dr. Reitman taught me all about Ned's condition. He taught me how to handle the situation when Ned had an episode of rapid heart rate. He taught me not to be an alarmist....that if I behaved like an alarmist, my reaction could scare Ned. He gave me the confidence to trust my instinct with Ned and his condition and what actions to take. All of this was done with the utmost kindness, respect and genuine care for Ned and our family. When Ned's condition got to a point that he needed to have a catheter ablation performed, Dr. Reitman guided us to an electro-cardiologist who took phenomenal care of Ned. For the past 4 years, Ned has been on the 2 year plan---a check-up every 2 years. We went today to see Dr. Reitman; Ned had a great check-up and is in good health! Dr. Reitman is about to retire, however. We may not have another check-up with him.I have tears in my eyes as I think of how grateful I am that we were guided to Dr. Reitman and his staff and colleagues. Having a child who has a health issue is very challenging; the fear of the unknown can be overwhelming. However, to have a doctor who is not only skilled, but also loving and kind and thinks that it is wonderful that you are asking questions......who could ask for anything more? I took this picture of Ned with Dr. Reitman today.....Ned was 5 lbs. when was born; he fit in Dr. Reitman's hands.....look at the two of them now.